Back in Time, Filling in Details

I have long promised that I would go back and fill in the details to make this a complete story. Now, years later, I'm keeping that promise.

Let's start with a quick update. I am doing well, only a few scars are left to remind me of the surgery. I still have a fairly significant scar that runs down the middle of my chest, but it has faded quite nicely. As an interesting side effect, there is particular spot on my chest, the size of a finger tip, where I have no feeling what so ever. Scars where the chest tubes were inserted are also still evident. Finally, there are a couple of scars on my left leg, that are only visible if I happen to not be wearing any pants.

For this entry, my goal is to describe the first few minutes after I awoke as I remember them.

I clearly recall waking up, feeling the respirator, but being entirely at peace with the intrusion. I also remember people being in my room, people other than my daughters. The biggest surprise to me then and now is how natural and calm it all felt. I knew I could not speak so I used my right hand to spell the names of my daughters in the air. Upon recognizing that I was signally, someone left the room to fetch them. I do not know if they read what I was spelling, but I doubt it.

Soon enough my daughters were in the room and it seemed like it wasn't long before the medical staff took me off the respirator as well. That process was surprisingly easy. I can only guess that the drugs they had me on kept me calm, because it all seemed so peaceful and serene. I remember being very happy to see my daughters and at the same time worried that I must have been a very scary site. I do not recall any pain from those first few hours.

That is all for this post, I plan to go into the time in the intensive care next.

The Dragon wakes and lashes out at whatever's nearest...

I'm awake again, by your puny human terms it was a long sleep this time, what a year maybe? Six months perhaps? It was a mere cat nap in my lifetime, nothing more than the human equivalent of sleeping off a big meal. But I awoke with a fury that only a dragon could have. An anger at my human companions and an even greater anger at myself for having human companions.

Why should a dragon have companions, friends if you will, that aren't also dragons? Are we not fooling ourselves that we can be friends to them and they to us? Isn't there something fundamentally incompatible about a dragon; an immense, fearsome, wise and immortal being befriending a human. A human with their mortality and humanity crammed into a soft package of emotions.

Why should we have anything in common, and why should I, a dragon, look upon a human as something I want as a companion? More to the point, why should a human want something immense, ageless and probably by their terms soul-less as a companion?

And I want to be fair to humans for a second here, isn't it not that humans aren't fit companions for dragons, but rather that dragons aren't fit companions for humans. What human wants to be around something so arrogant and righteous as a dragon? We preside over humanity like we are gods, though we know we are not. Immortality is just a cloak of godliness that disguises that curse of an unending life.

So I, dragon of dragons, realize that I'm just fooling myself with my human companions. It is no longer possible for me to separate their friendship from their fear of my wrath should they disagree with me. And I betray myself with my 'need' for humans as companions. For in the end when they walk from my lair, whether for a day or eternity, it hurts me. And it angers me that I should be hurt by this. For I am the wise, and the immortal; I should be able to give without taking and my pain is a betrayal not just to myself, but to humanity.

I say this and watch as my scribe trembles with the words he types. But, alas I know not if I have the strength and resolve to take steps to return to my solitary dragon ways. And though my great wisdom tells me I should not, must not, need these humans around me, my heart hurts at the thought of the loss.

Any why should a dragon need mortals more than mortals need a dragon?

The Dragon is awake again, be afraid, be very afraid....

More later,

Jack

Back from a long sleep...

For anyone paying attention, the dragon has reawakened and is back posting again. But, you probably figured that out already. So, where've I been? Sleeping, just sleeping. More on the specifics later.

Now since my little corner of the internet is not often read by fellow dragons, I should explain something at this point. See, I imagine a lot of you, if there is even a lot of you out there reading, wonder how is it that I can just slumber away six months of my life. Well it's really not so difficult you see we dragons live forever, mostly; and when one lives forever 6 months is a really short time. And quiet honestly, for the average human it doesn't seem to change much in their life either. When I catch up with the few humans I care about (which means humans I don't plan to eat anytime soon), I find that often their lives are just as they were before my slumber.

Now I do have to say that my scribe, Jack Scribe, seems to be the exception to this rule. Often six months or a year is enough to entirely turn his life upside down. As an example, it wasn't 15 months ago that he had never acted in his life. Now he's been in a few shows in community theater and is thicker than thieves with several actors. Most recently, it seems that in the six months that I've been sleeping ol' Jack Scribe has once again discovered his mortality. He's about to go in for some surgery and sometimes I catch him actually moping about this and that. The thing is that I know he is so mean an ornery (that's what I like about him) that he'll be around for just about forever. As a result it's just a bunch of melodrama on his part; did I mention he's an actor now? ;)

But, I haven't really gone into any details as to why I've been off sleeping; a six month nap not exactly being normal for me. Well let me just say that I've recently learned a bit of a life lesson: one needs to be careful when he puts all of his eggs in one basket. There are those amongst us who put 100% of our effort into a job, hobby, spouse, family or something else along those lines. Sadly, I think it is often the job that gets 100%, but that's a discussion for another day. The beauty of such a single minded focus is in the focus. It's amazing what one can achieve if he puts all of his living breathing effort into one thing. But the darker side is that this focus had better work, because if we screw up that one thing, we've just messed up our entire lives.

And this brings me back full circle to my recent long nap. See, I did exactly this, put all my eggs in one basket. This particular basked was the search for my parents, or at least some sign of my parentage. After spending months in the search, I came across one dead end after the other. Finally, with no more options or ideas open to me, I gave up the search and promptly fell into my slumber. I have only now come out of this slumber and spent some time, in my lair, re-evaluating my life as a dragon.

Which leads me to the last and most important point I intend to make in this particular post, an apology to my scribe. Jack Scribe is more than just a scribe to me, he is my friend. This is a word that I do not use casually, and I am not too proud to admit that Jack Scribe is the closest of friends. This despite the fact that I am an ancient dragon, and he is a human. See, in addition to being my friend, Jack sometimes helps me in procuring food. By this I mean, he has lured um...other humans...To my lair. This is something he is particularly good at, and he does it to make me happy in spite of the fact that it makes him depressed and sad. I realize now that, though he may be the perfect person for the task, I must separate our friendship from my search for food, even if this means I go hungry for a while. It can only make our friendship stronger. So this is for you Jack; I'm sorry and I will gladly go hungry for ten years before I will ask that of you again.

Not planning to wait six months for another update,

Jack Dragon

My Scribe speaks...

This is a very short post to introduce my scribe's blog. He thinks he has things to say too, so he's created his own blog: Jack Dragon's Scribe. There is a link in the upper right.

Read and enjoy, but if you message me to tell me his is better, I will hunt you down and eat you, slowly.....

Have a nice day,

Jack Dragon

Parent and Child, Child and Parent....

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know I've been gone a long time. If you missed me I'm sorry, really sorry; I missed writing to my blog and what few fans I have. If you didn't miss me, it doesn't matter, I'd just as soon eat you as write a blog post for you.

I've been off in a long a fruitless search for my parents. More on that a little later though there is nothing much to tell. And my scribe, who I am rather fond of, otherwise he would have been a snack a while ago, well he's been off pursuing a non-career in community theater. I say non-career because he and I both know all he's doing right now is gaining experience. He's got a lot to learn yet about acting and such so I really don't want to squash his enthusiasm. So I put up with his absence, just as he must put up with me, both present and absent.

And yes, if you haven't picked up on it yet, I'm a bit bitter. Not just typical dragon bitter, a couple levels above that. See, I've been off on this search for my parents and I've come to a raging dead end. A dead end before I even began. I can not find the cave where they lived when I was born and I can not find thier trail from there. I've spent so much time in the area, that people are starting to believe I exist and that makes things difficult. So I will need to take a few months off the seach and rethink things.

And this all makes me bitter. Bitter because I can't find my parents. Bitter because I can't just ask around and look at archives like you people can. And bitter because I don't even know what I'm looking for or why it's so stinking important to me. Honestly, it's not like my parents raised me or anything.

But, I have had time to think, and I can answer those questions now. I know what I am looking for and I know why it's important. I just need to know that I was something more than a nusance, a thing that casued trouble for them. I need to know that I mattered to the two dragons that brought me into the world. And if that's not the case, I guess I need to know that so I can deal with it. And I will deal with it, but first I must find them, or some sign of them that can answer my questions. It is simply what I must do.

Back from some time away...

Quick post from this dragon, with promises of a longer post in the days to come.

I've been off on a so far fruitless search for my parents. My scribe has also been 'away' pursuing his 'career' as an actor in community theater. Though I do not like it when he leaves me scribe-less for so long, he did pretty good. As good as someone with a bad voice can do in a musical . He even received some critical acclaim. Here's my favorite: "Jack's scribe has a voice that would make a baby cry, but he had a great time with it. Much of what was missing in the rest of the cast was this kind of fun and energy so vital to comedy. " And then there is this: "The best work comes from the people who get to do short spurts. Jack's scribe bursts in for
some quick laugh-getters...". Overall, he did well and I am happy to have him back scribing. I would even pat him on his little head, but last time I did that he had to go to the doctor.

I was off in search of my parents. More specifically, I was searching for the motion where I was born. As I noted earlier, I think I've found the village nearby, but the mountain it's self has been a little elusive. There are a few candidates in the area, but I am having trouble narrowing it down to just the one. Once I figure that out, I will have to do some scouring to find the cave or den where I was born. I expect that to provide some clues that I might follow to where my parents went next. It's been frustrating so far, but when one is immortal, time doesn't matter. If it takes another 100 years to track them down, I will be happy.

And with that I am off to take a long dragon nap. I am working out some issues in my head, and sleeping seems to help me with that. I am near to putting a long standing issue to rest, and that will free me up to grumble about a lot of other things. I always like the free feeling I get when I finally move something out of my mind and into a few bits of treasure in my hoard.

Off to dream, maybe I'll see you there too...

Jack Dragon

Answering some questions...

I've been away for a bit again, more parental research, but I did have time to quickly reply to a couple reader questions. More on the parental research in a later post.

How many genes determine coloration in dragons? Are you red or green or brown?

I am red, though I don't know if I've yet mentioned that. I'm not sure about the genetics of it all, but one would guess that red was a dominant gene. I can tell you this much, and you can help me figure it out, dragon colors are absolute, they are either red or green (or black or whatever), but never a mix of colors or a shade between color.

Did you visit the mountain where you were born?

You'll have to keep reading to find that out. I am sure it will get covered one way or the other.

More late,

Jack